May 26, 2008

BEHAVE!!!!

I will be out of town for the next few days. Try not to mess anything up here, ok? Don’t have a slumber party and try to Ouija up the ghost of Marilyn Monroe while giving each other belly button piercings and henna tattoos. Or skateboarding! Absolutely not!
And positively NO ferrets in the house! Do you guys remember last time???


Before I go, I have a favor. Does anybody know what this gadget is? My friend found it in a box of kitchen stuff at a garage sale. It is very light-weight (aluminum, I’m guessing), no trademarks or any markings on it. The two long parts push together like a tongs. When you push it together the square part goes thru a slot. It's not sharp. It's like something you'd use to cut butter, maybe? I’ve never seen anything like it. We’re hoping it is some rare implement of which there are only 3 of in the whole world, and we can then take it to “Antique Roadshow” and have it valued at $37,494.



What could this be, people????

Then, after I sell it to some Eurotrash folk-art collector, I’m totally not blogging anymore, ‘cause I’ll be in Bali, running a day spa.
So, if you have any idea, and can identify this, you get a 20% off a massage in Bali. Or a seaweed body wrap….your choice.

"The Dish Day Spa"


Also, my favorite brother-in-law, Kim, sends me the greatest emails. Ok, maybe not all of them are great. I’m pretty fed up with the ones about blondes with big boobs. And priests, rabbis, and a donkey at a bar. And why Hillary Clinton’s ankles are like NASCAR. Like……I care, Kim????? Can't you see I'm a very busy person, trying to score on Antique Roadshow???

Anyway, the photo below he sent me last week is still cracking me up. I sooo want to make this for someone someday….preferably Anthony Bourdain….if he would ever answer my emails. How many do I have to send anyway, Tony??? Listen, I can only hold that room in Nogales for another two weeks! Get back to me, dude!



"Redneck Seafood Dinner"



16 comments:

Peter M said...

"Ohhhh, I wish I was an Octo-Mayer weiner"!!!!!

Emily said...

OMG- that is so funny! It took me a minute to figure out what it was.

I don't know what that gadget is. Maybe a seafood cracker?

Enjoy your time away...

Leah said...

I am DYING over that picture. I'm totally whipping that up for my kids, they'll crack up!

Have a nice time!!

Thistlemoon said...

Now THAT is awesome! Have a great time away!

Catherine Wilkinson said...

peter m,
HAhahahah! Only you could come up with that! Hilarious!

emiline,
I think it's too light to be a cracker...it's about 6 inches long and very light

leah,
they will! I can't wait to do it myself! With mac and cheese!

jenn,
yes. sometimes it's the simple things.

Deborah said...

I'm not sure what the contraption is, but have fun on your time away!

Anonymous said...

hahaha.. you cracked me up with that redneck seafood plate. hahaha. You're too much but hey! Are you cheating on me with Tony Bourdain? Damn!

I believe the gadget is a human nut-cracker. :-)

Prudy said...

I've seen those before! They were briefly, very briefly, on the target snack shack menu. I was repulsed-but they are hilarious!

Prudy said...

I've seen those before! They were briefly, very briefly, on the target snack shack menu. I was repulsed-but they are hilarious!

Valerie Harrison (bellini) said...

Too funny..I might have been able to get my daughter to eat hot dogs if I had served them like this:D About the gadget I would be guessing...no idea:D

Heather said...

Haha! I have seen the device that does that to a hot dog.

This weekend there will be a special tribute blogpost to you, madear! Thank you so much. (^*^)

Cakespy said...

This is the funniest thing I have seen all week! So trashy/awesome at the same time!

As for the objet de kitchen...um...a high tech nose picker?

Catherine Wilkinson said...

jenny,
thanks...it's hilarious, isn't it??
The boys will love it!

deb,
it's a mystery, isn't it??

zen,
nah, never! Bourdain is a hillbilly compared with you!

prudy,
I'm thinking they'll be a perfect dish for the under 10 set!

val,
I tried to make fish sticks look interesting...my kids couldn't stop with the poop jokes!

heather,
my pleasure, babycakes! Can't wait!!!

cakespyette,
who knows, eh? Nose picker is a good guess!

Anonymous said...

The little gadget is for dolloping cookie dough out. I bought one like 10 yrs ago from pampered chef.. works ok, but unfortunately will not be with thousands!! Sorry

Catherine said...

I'm trying to wrap my brain around how that thing might dollop out cookie dough.

martha aka/Norita said...

Catherine, I think that little "thingy" might be a butter picker-upper. (I've seen some for cheese also) You squeeze it to stab a pat of butter (or slice of cheese), then let it go to drop it on your bread or whatever.

I'm not sure what it is, but I think I might have one.....somewhere.

 
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"The Dish" by Catherine Wilkinson is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 United States License.